The headlines read "Teacher Signs Seventy Million Dollar Contract". The story reports on how the students all said they were going to miss their teacher, but they understood her decision. After all, she was eating cat food for lunch and shopping at Goodwill. With all the current fuss over free agent athletes, I cannot help but imagine a world where teachers could command the type of salaries that professional athletes command.
For instance, because I have completed twenty years in one school district and am still relatively young enough to retire and procure a teaching assignment in another district, I am, in some respect, equivalent to a free agent. If six school districts were seriously vying for my services and were willing to pay upwards of seventy million dollars, I would be counting my apples and weighing all the options. Due to past performance I could command specific contract incentives or bonuses such as an extra five hundred thousand based on the number of my students who pass the state assessment, the number of referrals written per year, and the number of sick days I utilize in one school year. My incentive list would be endless.
My current district, being a big city venue, would make an offer of sixty million making their pitch contingent on loyalty, my having vested twenty years. However, with my experience I would want to test the waters. Perhaps one of the top school districts in Chicago would up the ante to sixty-five million and throw in the option of choosing from the top performing charter high schools with an average enrollment of four hundred students. Ummm, the possibility of small class size would peak my interest. No more classes of thirty-six to forty students packed in a small space like sweaty sardines. Of course Miami's best performing district would get wind of Chicago's sixty-five million dollar offer and place seventy-five million on the table along with incentives such as never having to take work home. District graders would evaluate all papers, tests, and quizzes, leaving me to enjoy an evening at home with family and friends. Now The Department of Education in New York would probably just want to look as if they are interested in order to appease their parents/fans. So their pitch is somewhat insulting, sixty million along with a guaranteed and viable curriculum aligned with state standards and an assurance that I would not have to attend any irreverent faculty meetings, only professional development workshops of my own choosing. Of course I would scoff at their sixty million dollar offer. How dare they insult me!
If such circumstances were a reality, school reform would not be such an immediate necessity because many of the problems that plague under performing schools would diminish. I wouldn't mind the long hours or the work taken home. I would relish in the overcrowded classroom because I could pay an assistant out of my own pocket. Seventy million, are you kidding me? I have nothing but respect for all of the top professional free agent athletes who will undoubtedly earn more than seventy million.
After all, NBA players can jam a round ball into a basket ten feet from the floor. MLB players can hit a ball four hundred feet, and NFL players can fly around a field knocking the snot out of each other. All I can do is communicate with and impart some knowledge on young impressionable minds, build some character, and instill some sense of the importance of education. Oh well, a teacher can dream, can't she?
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